Give Hi a Chance

You get a Hi from a guy on your online dating account – and that’s it.

I used to get a lot of “Hi” messages to my online dating account on OK Cupid. That’s it – just “Hi.”

At first, I used to answer back “Hi,” or “Yes?”

The next message was usually “How are you?”  My answer “Good and you?”

It sounds boring – and it was.

I really appreciated the guys that were creative enough to write “Hi,” introduce themselves and engage me into an interesting discussion. But that didn’t mean that the standalone “Hi” guys were ignored.

I reviewed every profile a “Hi” was sent from and decided if I want to continue the discussion or not – on the spot decision – ‘I don’t think we have a match.’ Why waste your time and the other person’s time, if you don’t feel something interesting will come out of it?

The ones that started a real discussion got my attention, as a discussion was going on. It did not matter that the picture was not so great, the fact that the guy had something to say was a great start.

But – as everything in life – there is no one cookie cutter, right?

I remember this specific “Hi” I got from a man – later on, will be remembered as Mike Motek (Hebrew = Honey/Sweetie) – story #11 in the book. Mike did not write more than two sentences together, and usually finished his sentences with “LOL.”

I hated it! Yes, I know I’m funny, but I am not THAT funny. I told him that. So, he started finishing his sentences with hahaha. Smart ass. I did not enjoy our texting and was very close to dropping this conversation.

Saturday was approaching and Mr. LOL/hahaha asked me out for dinner. He was my last choice to choose from, and frankly my only choice for that Saturday, so I decided to say yes.

That date changed my mind about the “Hi” and who sends those messages.

I met a very good looking man, a great conversation took place, and Motek admitted that he has dyslexia, and is struggling to communicate through texts that are more than two to three sentences. In his professional life, Mike was a Navy engineer and amazing with numbers and technical information, but that’s it – his writing skills were awful and he did not even try to fix it – “it is what it is” he said to me.

We started dating on a regular base, his text messages stayed short and LOL was ending most of his sentences, or a big smiley emojis. At one point Mike even started to learn Hebrew, to greet me in the mornings and show that he cares to learn about me and my heritage. It was sweet and very appreciated from my side. I knew that he is trying hard to get over his lifetime challenges, and I was very impressed by his efforts.

It thought me a very important lesson – give “Hi” a chance.

Don’t be fast to dismiss a “Hi” that comes to you. Men are not as communicative as women and they “poke” and see who gets back to them, before they put more effort into the discussion. From the men’s side, I believe that a “Hi” from a woman is a great start – guys love it! Although, I don’t know many women who will just send a “Hi.” I just asked my husband if he ever got a “Hi” from a woman. His answer: “Women don’t send “Hi” – they never approach men.”

On my side – I was always worried about my grammar and Hibrish sentences (Hebrew plus English,) but it never stopped me. It usually gave me and the person I was texting a good laugh. Oh, I did approach men that looked interesting – more on that next time.

So – Give “Hi” a chance and see what happens.